Monday, December 10, 2012

Lots to post about, not lots of time.....

Jack's birthday was awhile ago. I'll post about that soon. Before that was Dasha's sleep study. That was fun. My beautiful daughter decided to try out for her school's dance and drill team and made it. And of course Thanksgiving and Tyler's birthday were next so they will need posts. But first I have some random thoughts that have to come out of my head before I explode. I miss my mom. My lack of desire to have Christmas this year is, conversely, making me more efficient. Lots of my shopping is done. I've been cleaning and sorting and organizing. 99% of the decorating is done. I'm working on the planning for teacher gifts. Those people that I can count as true friends are few and far between. I miss you guys too. And I realized the other day that the people that I know I can count on I met 20 or more years ago. Weird. One person that I did truly count on let me so far down I only recently began to recover and it's been over 2 1/2 years. I want a bigger house. I love this house. It is our home. We've been here 20+ years. All of our children have come home to this house. We've celebrated holidays, birthdays, baptisms, confirmations, and so far, one graduation here. But we have outgrown it. We have 2 children who may potentially live with us for many many more years. We have (possibly) 5 children who might have spouses &/or children and will visit here. This house won't work for that. So someday, I hope to find another home, that will work. Everyday I am thankful for my kids. We don't always agree and someday we all may live apart. But I am confident that they will always be in my life. And that is important. I am tired. And everyday is a big fat act to appear "okay". When I am alone and have no distractions, things are not okay. I cry a lot. This includes driving, doing the dishes, and cleaning. I think I could sleep for a week at a time. Not sure what to do about any of that. Ho. Ho. Ho.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Halloween!

Our 2 littlest kiddos really enjoyed Halloween this year.  I think they both “got it” – wear a weird outfit and people will give you candy – woo hoo!!

Since every year we try to have a “Jack” theme, this year we did this:

10-31-12 005 10-31-12 004

(Jack looks thrilled, right?!)

I think the costumes turned out really cute.  I decided on the card theme but was hasn’t sure about how to do it.  Dasha’s teacher gave everyone in her class a paper grocery bag to decorate to wear in class and voila!  It was the perfect shape and size, and cheap too!  I bought spray paint for the bags, sparkly paper for D’s crown, a foam sheet for Jack’s hat, and a paint pen.  Andrew helped me print out the card fronts and backs and we called it done!  Here’s the backs:

10-31-12 001

Dasha had a fun party in her class:

10-29-12 049 10-29-12 047

And a few days later Jack had his class party.  Since D was out of school Jack’s teacher said she was welcome to come to his party:

10-31-12 006

10-31-12 010 10-31-12 008

Then last night we went trick-or-treating:

10-31-12 017 10-31-12 016

Enjoy guys, in a couple of days the pumpkins will be empty!

Monday, October 29, 2012

21 Things About Jack – 2012

1. He’s cute!

2. His favorite thing is still his blue blanket :).

3. He sleeps in his own twin bed, every night, all night.

4. He likes to be silly, and make us all laugh.

5. He still lets me use the pirate theme for lots of his clothes.

6. Jack has adjusted beautifully to kindergarten.  He likes to go, he likes his teacher(s), he likes his classmates.

7. He is finally learning to count and identify letters (upper and lowercase!).  Whew!

8. Still has NO interest in potty training :(.

9. I could look at his face all day long if he ever would sit still long enough.

10. He likes VeggieTales, SpongeBob, Toy Story, and other Disney movies, in that order.

11. He likes to read stories, and will sometimes sit and practice letter-writing with me (ie do homework).

12. He eats great – likes some veggies (that’s better than none), loves to drink milk and eats a variety of foods.

13. He knows how to open all the doors in our house that go outside.  So now we have to use door knob covers and come up with more ideas to keep him from letting himself and his sister out!

14. He still has a tendency to run when out.  He has to be holding my hand or within grabbing range at all times.  It is exhausting.

15. I love Jack’s eyes – they are a beautiful clear blue and have gorgeous lashes.

16. He’s very tenderhearted.  Jack identifies when someone is sad or hurt and wants to make it better.  So sweet.

17. Either everyone at his school wants to play it up for me, or they really do love him.  When we walk down the hall every grown-up says hi to him (by name).  When I get to talk to any of them, they tell me how cute he is, or how much they want to squeeze him.  It really warms my heart.

18. He loves his siblings and now even looks for Dasha to play with.  It cracks me up how he says “Dashlyn”.

19. Jack loves music.  We listen to the same songs on our way to his school every day and if I forget he’s quick to remind me - “Mom, music!”.  And he’s starting to sing independently.  It’s hard to tell unless you know, but he keeps singing the Happy Birthday song.  So cute.

20. Jack is a busy guy.  He likes to go downstairs with TyTy and Andrew, or go outside, or play in his room.  He still pushes matching things around sometimes, but he’s starting to use his imagination too.

21. Our whole family is so grateful he is here!  We’re all better people because of him.  We make it a point to enjoy the small things.  We take the future more seriously.  We take the present very seriously.  And we laugh waaaaay more than we would without him!

Well, my post for "later today" was a complete fail. I went back to find the next part of Jack's story and was trying to delete a couple of sentences that didn't need to be in the copied post. And I deleted it. The original. The whole damn thing. All gone. As though I needed one more thing to be depressed about. I sent a message to blogger asking if I could get it back and still have no reply. So I will need to recreate it. But easier said than done. I haven't done nearly enough for the month - Down syndrome Awareness month and the month of Jack's birth. But I have a few posts for the next few days, especially about Jack's birthday.

Monday, October 8, 2012

I will post the second part of Jack's story later today. Just have to find it. I feel like I need to apologize for my complete lack of enthusiasm for Down syndrome Awareness month this year. I'm tired. I don't care about, well, anything. I can't seem to make anyone happy and when I try, someone else gets pissed off or has their feelings hurt. I'm at the point where the effort to try is mostly too hard. I have decided to be okay with being basically alone. Friends are too hard right now. I am however, working to make myself more enthusiastic about this month; I used to care a great deal about it and Jack's birthday is at the end of the month. His celebration is going to be very low key but I'll do my best to make sure he knows he's loved and gets to do something fun. I love all my kids so much; but the little 2 are the only reason I get up in the morning. What a crappy post. Sorry online friends.

Thursday, October 4, 2012

This has GOT to be a record....

Usually, I make it through several days before I start missing posts. This year I missed the first 3 days of 31 for 21 posting! (If there is anyone reading that doesn't know what 31 for 21 is, please leave a comment and I'll explain. Otherwise, I'm going to assume we're all on the same page.) I usually start off celebrating Down syndrome Awareness month with revisiting Jack's story. I told it in more than one parts - here's the first part: At about 12 weeks pregnant (right after we found out we were pregnant), I decided to do that nuchal fold test, where they measure the back of the baby's neck (via ultrasound). There's some magic number that is a marker for ds. With every pregnancy, I took pretty much all the tests because I like to be prepared. This sounded like an easy one, so I took it. They couldn't get our little one to be in the exact right position, so it didn't work. That was on a Fri. We tried again on Mon., still with no results. I don't really remember what made me decide to have the amnio; I just remember having the appointment and my friend Sherry telling me she would come with me because she didn't want me to go alone. This was really a big deal 'cause she lived a couple of hours away. We found out Jack was a boy while getting prepped, and the actual amnio really wasn't bad. That was on a Wed. On Fri., while I was home, my ob called. "I really hate to tell you this, but your test shows Down Syndrome." I know he said more stuff but I sure don't know what it was. I called my husband at work and told him to come home. He did, and we cried together. We had plans that week-end but cancelled everything. We didn't tell anyone for almost 2 months. I just needed that time to be okay. It was really hard. People kept calling to ask if we heard anything yet and I lied. I said "no news must be good news, ha ha" knowing the whole time I would have to tell them at some point. It's an emotional thing. I honestly wasn't worried that anyone would be mean or anything, I just needed to get to the point where I was emotionally okay telling people because I knew I would be the one reassuring others. I thought no way can I start talking to people about this if I'm breaking down every time. Even my closest friends and our parents. For some reason, I needed to be strong. My dr. was great. He said, at the first visit after we found out, that we wouldn't dwell on the ds unless I had questions or concerns. He wanted me to feel like this was a regular, fun, miraculous pregnancy, just like it was. We finally told our other kids. They decided at once no one would ever make fun of their baby brother and were protective right away. They made me cry in a good way. We then told my parents; I kind of chickened out and told them when I was literally on my way out the door to go 3 hrs. home from a visit with them. After a quick hug, I ran away quick so they could be upset and cry. Then I wrote a big long e-mail to all the friends and family I had an e-mail address for and even asked them to forward it to others. The response was really positive. Sounds anti-climactic, but that was it. I have one friend that I'm really close to and everyone was saying to her "wow, you sure kept that quiet" and she has to say "yeah, cause she didn't tell me" which I feel a little bad about but I just couldn't yet. The rest of the pregnancy was okay; I had gestational diabetes (special diet, blood checks, and even shots in my tummy!) and lots of ultrasounds and non-stress tests and an echocardiogram for Jack and everything came back great. Everyone acted very excited to see our new guy. We had the BEST baby shower. (That'll be another story!) (If anyone knows why my paragraphs aren't showing up, please let me know!) And I'll leave you with a peek of new Jack cuteness: Photobucket

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

My mom’s birthday……

was last Sat.  I should have been worrying about the card that I would send late (I have good intentions but crappy follow through) and calling to tell her “Happy Birthday!  Where did you go to dinner??”.  Less than 2 years ago she was staying with my kids while Allan and I and then Madelyn and I went to Ukraine to complete Dashlyn’s adoption.  Last Christmas she sat in her usual spot and watched my kids open their Christmas presents that she shopped and bought for them.  In March I was bummed because she and my dad didn’t come for M&D’s birthday party.  It was okay though – she was going to have back surgery and feel much better soon and then she would come visit without Dad.  Those visits were fun because she would stay at our house (instead of a hotel when Dad came with her) and we would shop and eat at IHOP and get cherry Cokes from Steak N Shake (mine were diet).  And I would get annoyed because her little Lifesavers wrappers would get left on my end tables and all her stuff would take up space in the bathroom and then I would start to miss her when she pulled out of the driveway to go home.

She would be getting such a kick out of how much Jack is talking now and what a big boy he is going to kindergarten.  We would be planning for Madelyn’s senior year, and Andrew going away to college next year.  I have plans for things I want to do to the house and I was looking forward to her input.  There are so many things I was looking forward to sharing with her, so many things she’ll not be with us for, so many conversations we won’t have, so many days I’ll cry over every dumb little thing.

I miss my mom. 

Thursday, September 27, 2012

School Year 2012-13 begins….

The 4 youngest all started on the same day, making life a little easier for once.  Let’s get some pics out of the way and the next post will be all Jack – he started kindergarten this year so I have lots of thoughts on him!

Madelyn is a junior this year and Ty is in 8th grade.  (M is going to hate that I posted this pic but she had her eyes shut in all the other ones!)

P1060280

And then, since they are big kids, Ty went off to catch the bus and our favorite boyfriend Charlie picked up M.  (I yelled at Ty when he hit the bottom of the driveway to look happy and that is what I got.)

P1060287 P1060288

Next it was Jack’s turn.  I drive him to school about an hour after M leaves and an hour before Dasha goes.  He has become IMPOSSIBLE to photograph!  These are the best I got :(

P1060290 P1060293

He had a good day and seemed happy to be there!  Good for this momma’s heart.

Dasha started preschool too.  I took a couple pics in the house and thought it might be fun to take some more outside of her school, forgetting about her foliage phobia :(.

P1060297

P1060299 

(She looks okay here but as soon as she saw how close she was to the tree the photo shoot was over!)

And some day soon, I’ll finish the post about Jack going to kindergarten.

Monday, August 27, 2012

Some of my “extra” kids

My extra super wonderful friend Sherry moved far far away a few years ago.  We try to keep in touch but of course it isn’t the same.  We try to get together every chance we can (she has relatives fairly close and I drove to visit her only once so far).  Last week her mom called and said that she had Sherry’s kids and did I want a visit from them?  HECK YEAH!  So she brought them to our house and we had a nice visit.  Lunch of pizza, lots of video games, and lots of chatting!  Thanks for sharing them with us Sherry and Scott, Gale and Gary!  We love you!

IMG_0430

Dasha with Gracie.

IMG_0432

My boys with James.

IMG_0433 

And our usual pic of everyone together!  (M had a babysitting gig and of course I forgot to do the pic when she was still home, dang it.)

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Summer cold, oh yay.

Jack has a history of respiratory issues.  Anytime he gets a cold, here comes the wheezing.  He started in with a slight cough 2 weeks ago.  This past week started the wheezing.  His big sis M did the same dang thing (rotten kids).  So we have a nebulizer from her adventures.  Our ped is great about letting us have albuterol on hand to use as needed.  It is awesome to be able to just whip that stuff out of the closet and use it.  I usually listen to his chest several times before we do it but the other day I didn’t even bother (I knew he needed it – I think sometimes I just like being able to use the stethoscope!).  And little man was ready for it – what a good boy!

IMG_0454 IMG_0455

IMG_0460

Sometimes he lets us help.  Always, he likes to snuggle when getting a breathing treatment.  Silver lining people.

Monday, July 2, 2012

Swimming!

Normally, by now we would have been at the pool several times.  But this year that’s a problem.  I have 2 wild little ones, and one momma vs. the 2 of them means I lose every time.  We’ve been a couple of times but only when I have some help.  We’ve set up the pool in the backyard or on the deck a couple of times but we have a problem with that too – we’ll cover that later.  Today, M and I got the crazy idea to use our old swing set slide to make a redneck water slide!  Jack LOVED it!!  M did too; she went down several times.  It was so cute to see her and Jack together.  He kept telling her when it was her turn and when he went first he tried to catch her when she got to the bottom.   

IMG_0465

So here’s my problem -

Jack is 5 and Dasha is 4.  Neither is potty-trained.  Jack has ZERO interest.  Every once in a great while we can talk him into sitting on the potty but I can count on one hand how many successes he’s had.  Dasha is more willing to try and if I remember to take her every 45 mins to an hour, she stays pretty dry.  But she isn’t usually interested in telling me when she has to go and #2 is usually done in the diaper/pullup.  We’ve tried everything.  They love potty videos; we watch daily.  D loves to flush and get a “smartie” as a reward.  I’m about to lose it over potty training.  If you have any suggestions, I’m all ears.

But the real problem is swimming.  Both kids wear a swimmer diaper in the pool.  But usually, one or both will poop while in the pool!  Disgusting!  My new policy is whoever poops in the pool is done.  We go in, get them cleaned up, they stay out for the rest of the day.  (I considered making sure they went before swimming, but neither kid is a scheduled pooper, so that’s too hard.)  The other kid has to wait while we clean out the pool and clean them off and then they can keep swimming.  Usually, pool poop is contained within the swim diaper but ewwwwww.  So going to the public pool is a problem.  We’re going on vacation soon.  What am I going to do with these two???  The pool poop is going to drive me insane!  Any ideas?  Anyone?

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

I absolutely, positively, cannot resist my sleeping kiddos

I can’t even count how many pics I’ve taken of them asleep.  I’m probably the only one who would ever be interested (and that is okay) but I’m sharing 2 now. 

P1060110

IMG_0228

Aren’t they completely precious?!  They both have the sweetest little hands.  Love, Love, Love!!

My husband and I have been pretty lucky.  All the kids sleep in their own beds all night long.  I hear them if they fall out of bed or are sick or something but for the most part we just give hugs and kisses and make sure the covers are accessible (I cover them up – they kick them off!) and shut the door and walk away.  Both little kids still have bed rails so they don’t fall out.  Jack started sleeping with a night light when we started getting spring storms and he was worried, but usually they sleep in the dark, doors shut, all night long.  I usually check on them before I go to bed and they are out.  It’s awesome!

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Something a Little More Cheerful

We’re having a very non-scheduled summer so far.  We’re looking forward to plenty of fun stuff in the next 2 months too.  So far the littles have remembered that they love swimming:

IMG_0376 IMG_0397

We’ve gone to a couple of movies and plan to go to lots more.

We’re sleeping ridiculously late and staying up late too (my favorite part of summer!).

We’ve spent time in the backyard and I have plans to find more ways to have fun there.

I have ideas for getting our house more organized and I’m hoping to get to that soon (including painting a few walls – YAY! I love painting!).

And it seems as though I need to take more pics.  I thought I was doing okay in that area but can’t find much so looks like I’m slacking off there. 

 

And finally, thanks for all the lovely comments and notes.  You guys are awesome.  I don’t like feeling so needy and pathetic but I’m feeling the hugs – keep ‘em coming!

Sunday, June 10, 2012

And things go from bad to worse……

My mom has been gone for just over 2 months now.  2 very long months.  A few days ago would have been my parents’ 53rd anniversary.  I was thinking of them both all day, and especially my dad, as he tried to make it though not just another day, but a very special day in his life, and one that should have involved a bouquet of flowers, a dinner out, and a time of sharing special memories.

But I’m not done.  Just over 2 weeks ago, my aunt (my mom’s sister) took my uncle to the hospital.  He hadn’t been acting quite right for awhile, and that day she knew something was wrong.  Over several days and several tests, she learned my uncle has large tumors growing on his brain, and will not be with us much longer.  I drove to visit him, in a city far away, leaving my kids and family, in an attempt to say goodbye and I love you, because I’m sure I’ve not been able to do that adequately up to now.  I’ve been selfish and naive, thinking there’s all the time in the world.  When I got home I realized my amazing kids wanted a chance to say bye too, so we drove up again and got home tonight.  He knew who we were and I hope was happy to see us.  When we left, I again said I love you.  I’ve decided that whether you lose someone quickly, or have time to get ready, it sucks either way.    

But I’m still not done.  I knew another uncle, my dad’s sister’s husband, has not been well.  He and my aunt have been fighting his alzheimer’s for awhile.  I found out while I was away the first trip that he has died.

To be clear, I don’t feel bad that my very much loved family members have died and gone to live with Jesus.  I know they are healthy, happy, and in a much better place than we are.  But I want my mom.  I know my aunt and cousin aren’t ready to spend the rest of their lives without my uncle.  I’ve decided there is no good way to lose a family member, quick or time to say goodbye – no good way.  I’m tired of crying, feeling like I want to throw up one minute and wanting to stuff my face the next.  My kids have no idea what to do with me.  I couldn’t buy mother’s day cards and here comes father’s day.  The other day (well, it was a couple weeks ago) I had to leave Wal Mart because an older lady came in leaning on her cart to hold herself up while pushing it and that’s what my mom did.

I know lots of my friends have learned to live without their mom, but how??  How do you do it?  

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Last day of school

We had a lovely year at preschool.  Dasha will be there again next year but Jack will be graduating to kindergarten!!  Yes, really!  There’s a big kindergarten IEP post coming; just have to finish up some thoughts.  Anyway, I usually try to dress the kids in pretty cheap and “get completely filthy” type of clothes for daily school wear.  But on the last day I put Dasha in something cute for once, and did her hair a little prettier than usual.  And I forgot to take pics before school but I did manage a couple after school – unfortunately, this is the best one:

P1060065

Miss D looks little rough after playing hard at school but the shirt is cute, right??  (Thanks Ella!!)

Friday, May 25, 2012

A Visit from our Friends

We always have a fun time when Braska and Kinlee come to play!  I didn’t get any good pics of all the littles playing together of course, but when they all sat down to watch an episode of Signing Time, I got a few cute pics of the visitors :

P1060070

P1060071

Thanks for coming to play friends! 

Monday, May 14, 2012

Catch-up

I have waaay too many of these, but it's time for me to get a couple of things down before I forget. Madelyn was inducted into NHS (National Honor Society), along with several of her friends. We were very proud of her.
Both Madelyn and Tyler had their Spring Orchestra concerts, and they participated in the annual All-District concert where all the students in orchestra in the whole district play a few seperate songs and then a couple together. The lower grades play the same songs every year (that's where they all start, after all). But it occured to me the other night that I've heard those same songs 9 years in a row + 3 kids practicing at home. I should could be really sick of them. But I'm not. I'm a person who takes comfort in the expected, the routine, the planned. So it was nice, and comforting, to hear some familiar songs and fun to hear some new ones. Of course I got no pics of my violinists, they were too excited to get ice cream after the concert with their friends! Tyler was confirmed into our church last Sunday. We're Methodists. Confirmation is a time to learn about our faith, and our church, bond with the rest of the Confirmation class, and learn about other faiths. They went on a couple of overnight trips and had a great time. Ty told me any time he came home what a good time he had. That, in itself, is huge. But that it involved church was extra huge. After the past month, that was a giant comfort to my heart.
Jack's big kindergarten IEP is coming up. This is the meeting where we will determine Jack's present level of performance, placement for next year, and set some goal he will work toward in kindergarten. Now quite honestly, I have visited our home school, where I thought Jack would attend, where all the other kids went, where I know people and feel comfortable, and I don't think it is the place for him. Breaks. My. Heart. And I am not exaggerating. I left the school that day with a lump in my throat and a tight chest, and I wondered what the heck I was going to do. So I pulled my mommy hat on tighter and decided to visit another school in the district that I had heard good things about. Now I should explain, I am very happy with our school district overall. Yes, we've had a couple of issues but they've been resolved in a manner that's given me confidence in the district in general. I don't want my kids in private school. I've never been given convincing evidence that they're better than our district here. So ANYWAY, I went to visit this other school. The principal is someone I was familiar with (and have a good opinion of). The building and the people I encountered there were welcoming. The set-up for kids with special needs seems accommidating to all levels of functioning, easily adapable to different personalities, and eager to learn what works for each child. Jack would have access to a regular kindergarten class, and a special ed class. (Don't hate me for not being all about inclusion - I'm all about what works for my kid and he would be lost in a regular class all day, even with a 1:1 para. I want him to be successful and included where it will be the most beneficial to him.) So that will be coming up soon and I'm sure I'll have a big report on that.

Monday, April 9, 2012

I am now a new member of a terrible, awful, no-good, very bad club

Today is the day after Easter.  I won’t be posting any cute photos of the kids, wearing pretty Easter clothes and chasing down colorful eggs.  As a matter of fact, I may not post anything Easter related again.  I won’t ever look forward to Easter the way I did every year before this one.

My mom died last week.  Out of the blue.  Just didn’t wake up on Tues.  Her funeral was Sat.  It just doesn’t seem real and I pray daily that it’s not – let this be a terrible dream.  She was the one person in the entire wide world that I knew would always be there for me.  She never got to see Dasha’s hair cut.  She didn’t get to hear about our trip to the zoo week before last.  She won’t get to see any of the kids (except for Andrew) graduate high school, or get married.  She won’t ever come visit and live on the couch for a week again.  I have to live the rest of my life without her.  How the hell am I gonna do that.

My mom didn’t quite understand why we needed to adopt a little girl from halfway around the world who has Down syndrome.  But she wished us luck and asked what she could do anyway.  She could not have been more proud of her newest granddaughter.  She was sad when we found out Jack would be born with Ds.  But she wanted to be at his birth and stayed to get help me and get to know him anyway (and fell in love with him just like the rest of us).  She was thrilled when the other kids were born and so happy when we were all together.  She loved us all more than we’ll ever know.

I already miss her sitting in her chair, her little pile of kleenexes and lifesaver wrappers, her reading glasses and crossword puzzles.  No more cherry Cokes from Steak ‘N Shake, no more pj’s for Christmas, no more 60 degree rooms in July, no more envelopes full of newspaper clippings in my mailbox.  There’s something from my mom in every room in my house.  Neither of us liked having our picture taken so I don’t even have any of the 2 or us together in the last few years.  That was really, really dumb.

So here I am, in the “I don’t have a mom” club.  I hate it here.

Friday, March 23, 2012

Dasha’s Birthday

Dasha has a very special birthdate – it’s March 21, World Down Syndrome Day!  Cool, right??  However, because it was a special day, and because Dasha’s birthday is a few days before her sister’s and they are having a party together, we didn’t do a whole lot of celebrating.  A little bit, but the party will be later.  so I’ll post a few pics of the birthday girl on her special day anyway.

Is there anything more precious than a sleeping child?  IMG_0228

Here’s our sweet girl on our way into school :)

IMG_0233

And here’s our little beauty later that evening, while we were singing ”Happy Birthday” to her.  Rest assured, there was cupcakes and ice cream right after. 

P1050923

More cuteness to come!

Saturday, March 3, 2012

I’m Tired

All the time.  And I’m sick of it.  I’m sick and tired.  I forget things, appointments, plans.  I have 582 unfinished projects.  Tonight, Tyler was going to an overnight event for his confirmation class.  I did remember that.  However, I did not remember that he had to be dressed in nice pants.  We realized about an hour and a half before he had to be there that his one good pair of pants was, you guessed it, completely missing.  So while we were at Wal Mart purchasing new pants, I also got him socks and black shoes.  As long as we don’t lose them, we’ll be ready the next time.

So I managed to pull a win outta that situation.  But most of them, I don’t.  I don’t like feeling like this.  I used to be organized.  I used to have lists, organized thoughts, shoot even a calendar in my head.  Dates used to stick and I would remember to get ready ahead of time.  Field trips, birthdays, and meetings were planned for AND attended!  Instead, now every day is a surprise.  I struggle daily to try to keep it together.  I can’t seem to focus.  I hate this.  Am I just this old?  Is senility setting in already?  Do I have too much going in to my head?  Do I need ginko?  Anyone?

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Jack got a new bed - again

Several months ago, we decided it was time for Jack to have a big boy bed, so we got this:

 020

He loved it.  We loved it.  He and Dasha played in there a lot.  But there was a problem.  Even though I measured and figured the bed would fit in Jack’s room (which it did) there wasn’t enough space left over.  His room is 9x9.  Small.  The “hood” of the car bed faces the closet door, which would not open but maybe halfway.  There was only a narrow strip of floor available to play on.  It didn’t work and I was bummed.  So M and I decided to take out the racecar, and put in just a regular bed.  Guess what?  It works!

P1050869

Cute headboard, room to play on the rug, storage underneath in plastic boxes, aaaaaand, I can open the closet door!!  Win, win, win.  Except, did Jack like it?

P1050873

This is 2 seconds after we showed him the new bed.  He climbed right in and got comfy.  So I think that means we have a win, win, win, win!

Anybody wanna buy a cute, blue, twinsize racecar bed????

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Random stuff

When I left the room, I told Jack, “please use the coaster for your drink buddy”.  So he did.

P1050763

Pica-shoes!

P1050774

Ponytail!  (There are days in this house I can’t stand the cuteness!)

P1050769 P1050770

There’s so much wrong with this lol!  The most wrong part?  It was Saturday!  Not even a school day!

P1050785

I told them to put everything in the bucket.  They took that literal.

P1050789

Guess who went to another dance?  Aren’t they pretty?!?!

P1050799

I have more pictures but they are on my new phone and I need to learn how to download them onto the computer.

We woke up to snow this morning!  But it’s Feb, right? not so unusual.  But we’ve had crazy high temps this winter so far so it was a surprise!  If Jack said “snow” once on the way to school today he said it  50 times!  He’s really talking more now – initiating conversation, telling me things he sees, adding descriptions like the color.  It’s really great.  Finally, the kid is talking! 

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Heart Issues

Disclaimer - I don't know how to fix these pics! I will though!

So we found out Jack had Ds prenatally.  The next step was several ultrasounds and a fetal echocardiogram since many babies with Ds have heart issues.  (40% is what is stuck in my brain but as of right this minute I can’t back it up!)  Jack seemed great except the amniotic fluid was a little low a couple of times.  Even his heart was great.

And then he was born.  Within a few hours, it was determined that our little man had pulmonary hypertension and guess what else?  Heart issues.  Thanks a lot fetal echo (you worthless p.o.s.).  Our baby had a small to medium hole between the upper chambers of his heart (Arterial Septal Defect – ASD) and a medium to large hole between the lower chambers (Ventricular Septal Defect – VSD).  They had to be fixed.  Our goal was to get him big enough to undergo open heart surgery.  The problem was between the heart issue and the PH, he wasn’t able to stay alert enough to eat enough to grow.  So our guy had to have a feeding tube through his nose, or a ng tube.  The way he could sleep away while still getting food into his tummy.  Of course the Drs wanted to keep him in the hospital as long as possible but mommy was done with that place.  He was removed from the NICU not exactly against orders but I sure had to fight for him.  I think they were afraid I would steal him if they didn’t let me take him!  Jack removed his own ng tube a few times after we got him home, but after about a week, he was eating the required amount ON HIS OWN!

That was the end of Nov.  Less than 2 months later, our sweet baby boy underwent open heart surgery.  When the Dr called to say they were ready to set the date, I was a wreck.  I was shopping and cried right there in the store.  By the time we arrived at the hospital, I was okay.  I just wanted him fixed.  His surgery was on Tues. 

 

Wed was ugly; he was on morphine most of the day and so out of it.  He slept a few minutes at a time and would cry when he was awake  :( .  Thurs morning he was so different!  They moved him to a regular room, he was only on Tylenol, and that Sat, we went home!  4 days!

Thurs.

 

Sat., right before going home!

 

7days after open heart surgery!

Little did we know almost exactly 2 years later, the little girl that we would adopt was undergoing (in Ukraine) pretty much the exact same procedure!  The echocardiogram shows her surgery was to repair the same problems that Jack had.  Weird!  And even weirder, our cardio says it was a great fix.  Of course I don’t have photos of Dasha after her surgery and we weren’t there to hold her and whisper that it would be okay.  I hope someone was.  I am thankful every day that someone got her that repair.  But her scar looks even better than Jack’s!

Both of them now have near perfect hearts – the cardiologist says so :).  And today is the day, 5 years ago, that all of that started, Jan 23.   



So precious! Jack loves his sister :)